Miss to Miss

He knows how to read me like a book inside out, and yet, he doesn't fool me once. If it's fate, I leave it up to the gods to help me pave the way for something new. My heart yearns for the hits and misses when I'm being courted, like a girl that knows her way through this world, in a way that would appease him. Do I need to be this scared? I'm apprehensive about my likes and dislikes in a way I never was before, just to be a girl that he would be pleased to be with. 

      That's compromising. Me trying to change myself, though I didn't want it to change me, it did, I don't know if I'll forget about it if I write about it because trying to forget about talking to him purposelessly is creating fantasies in my head. He told me his relationships don't work out and I believe him because same. I think we've known about each other long enough. It's funny, we used to feel really attracted to each other, I don't think we are able to replicate that same energy and it's not our fault. 

I'm not satisfied with my post, I don't think I've written enough about this man enough. He's a manly man, and impressive to me. His hair has greyed and I don't think he's planning on changing that. Maybe if we meet our chemistry would be magical but at the moment I consider him my friend and I am revealing my life to him in all honesty because I don't have any other choice. I got messages from other boys too but I won't reply to them because this time, it's different, I'm focusing all of my energies on this one boy who I know will be there for me when I need him.